04Expert Video Answers

How do you plan a meaningful funeral service when the person didn't leave any wishes?

Small memories can help shape a meaningful funeral when someone has left no wishes. Think about their favourite music, interests, values and the moments that mattered to them. Sarah Corbette suggests bringing the family together to share those details: a song from a wedding or a love of gardening can be a starting point. Discuss cremation or burial with the person legally responsible for the arrangements; who has that authority depends on the circumstances and jurisdiction. If you are planning ahead, share your preferences with those likely to arrange your funeral.

For related guidance, see What’s the difference between a religious and a non-religious funeral service in Australia?.

Read the video transcript

This actually happens quite often. A lot of people have concern that they're not going to be able to honour their loved one as they would have wanted to. So I like to encourage families out there to be able to have these conversations first and foremost just to even though they can be uncomfortable for some just to and it doesn't have to be a playbook of the service or like from start to finish and dictated what needs to be done. It could be something as simple as dad really loved gardening and he'd like to have something to do with nature. Or could be mum just says, "Look, I would really like the song played at like my service that your dad and I danced at our wedding." Just those things, just something just a little tidbit that can be held on to. So for families who haven't even had those conversations or aren't sure whether they needed to have a cremation or burial, it's something that's going to have to come together with the family decision. But what we like to encourage families, it's a good time to get together to be able to discuss what type of songs they like. Do you remember the music that dad always played? It was country music and it drove us mad. So, we'll have to have a Slim Dusty song in there. Just all those little things that can make it meaningful for the family.

Need a hand?

Willed’s team helps Australians with this every day.

Share this guide: